Monday, November 30, 2009

The family I married into....

Did you ever get the feeling that the man you married might not be worth putting up with the inlaws??

I'm not going to tell the full story but the beginning two weeks of november was spent taking care of my brother-in-laws family. On the 4th my sister-in-law got arrested on some pretty serious charges. My brother-in-law had just had back surgery a week before. That left one dad who all of a sudden was single and wasn't supposed to lift a glass of water to take care of their three boys.

Dean the oldest (15) was angry (to say the least) and immediately refused to go back to school.
Lee the middle boy (11) was quiet and recluse (he is normally anyways) and very confused
and Ty (7) immediately went to bat for his mom and started the "she's a wonderful mom" stuff

Well Dean and Ty don't get along the best under the greatest of circumstances so imagine the battles over this with Ty defending and Dean mad as heck. was fun...

My mother-in-law took up "grandma post" and the boys and Rick (B-I-L) spent the first 5 nights at grandmas and didn't go home. Grandma fetched homework, cooked meals, tried to keep them fed and "happy", while trying to understand the whole thing herself and help them deal with this. To add to the mess grandma's house was getting a new roof and the dishwasher bit the dust.

Me on the other hand spent some time helping grandma cook, getting the homework done, and at Rick's request cleaning and organizing his home so that he could find things to take care of the boys.

Basically everyone's lives went on hold to help them deal with this. The boys slowly adjusted just in time for "mom" to be suddenly released Two weeks to the day that she was arrested. None of us are sure why the judge released her. We speculate that since our jail here is terribly overcrowded he needed someone to release so that they had more room and with the family here she isn't a flight risk.

So the SIL got out just in time for me to have my life back for a few days before thanksgiving. One day was spent desperately cleaning our house which hadn't been touched in that two weeks. The next few were spent getting the animals back up to par, building rafters for the goat barn, and helping my hubby figure out how to put in our new windows. Then on Wednesday Lilly and I went to grandmas house to help make desserts for thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving day was spent as one big happy family (in a manner of speaking). Friday we spent most of the time at grandmas too to help with leftovers, Saturday we took a drive and a picnic lunch to the mountains as one happy family (MIL's idea), Sunday we wnt to church then to grandmas for more leftovers since our kitchen was torn apart for putting in windows. Sunday afternoon I crashed and barely did anything.

That leaves today where I'm breathing a deep sigh of relief and exhaustion as I study the mountains of laundry waiting for me as well as everything dumped here and there. Also trying to catch up on thank you cards for the wonderful guys from the church who helped us put up our barn. Not to mention trying desperately to organize December's schedule which has gotten unbelieveably full since we have had the last two weeks with access to the Boy's schedules and all of their christmas, singing, band, and programs.

Other than the boy's schedules we also have a pesticide meeting this month (for my hubby to keep his pesticides liscense), his work party, Church caroling, Need to take the last goat to Cheyenne to be bred, need to figure out if one of the already "bred" girls is in heat or not, need to figure out the date that the baby bunnies will be due (if she's actually preg this time!), not to mention the monthly preg exam and chiropracter.
One of these months I'd like to get Lilly involved in Gymnastics and the reading time at the library. Also have my mothers of prescoohlers meetings as well.

The SIL has a hearing for entering her "plea" on the 15th and we are assuming she will remain "free" for awhile. Depending on when the trial actually is she may (probably) be looking at jail time. In which case our lives will likely go upside down again. She normally helps during calving and haying seasons. If they are speedy enough that she is back in jail by the end of Feb this may be the most stressful year we've ever had. She won't be here to help, Rick will still have to be careful of his back, I have four goats due as well as me, Lilly turns two in Feb., grandma and grandpa cant do calving all by themselves and that leaves just my hubby. We expect Tim to be laid off still at that time of year but with him needed that desperately for calving we may not get a choice on him working (which if he isn't "available" will cancel the unemployment payments).

Please pray for us as we struggle. I will try to keep you updated as frequently as possible. Right now we are fighting the daily weather and praying the warm streak holds so that we can finish the goat's barn, get all the windows in our house, get an xmas tree, and still be able to keep our minds.


fullfreezer said...

Oosh! What a whirlwind. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. Just remember to take care of yourself.

Zachary and Jennifer said...

Oh Boy! You have some drama going on. It is very nice of you helping out the family, regardless how much or little appreciation they show you. They are lucky to have you around! Families are tough sometimes...

Like Judy said, remember to take care of yourself too!

Take care, Jennifer

Jennifer said...

That is a lot going on! Why is family so much drama sometimes! It is wonderful that you are helping out but I hope you don't forget to take care of yourself through all of this. Hope calving season goes very smoothly for you all.

small farm girl said...

Oh my! That's a lot going on! I hope you can step away sometimes and spend time on just yourself. You are important to.

Kelle said...

First, let me say, you need a "HUG". My Dh, unfortuantely, can atest to having trying inlaws*sigh* My parents have caused more problems for us than we had expected, that is to say the very least.

I agree, you and your Dh need to take time for YOUR family, otherwise you'll begin having stress related stuff come between you.

You NEED to worry about yourself,Dd and Dh first, then take care of your animals, then if you can, help the inlaws.

Take a deep breath, a long slow walk( with DH and Dd)and enjoy yourselves and each other. {{{HUGS}}}

LillySue said...

Just remember that you will be blessed for your kindness to others. Hope you are feeling more rested this week.

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